It Does Everything…While You Do Nothing

You know what I want for Chanukah/Christmas/Kwanza/National Atheist Day? A freakin’ hammock. I’ve never actually owned one, but every time I get into one - the world stops. There are other ways to make the world stop, but they mostly give me the munchies and I don’t need to eat more than I already do during the holidays.

It’s absolutely impossible to be stressed or think bad thoughts in a hammock. Therapists should prescribe time in a hammock to reduce anxiety. Any fights between husbands, wives, neighbors and nations should be resolved by each battling party getting into their own hammocks. Before long, it’ll be, “What were we fighting about?” Instead of dropping bombs on Iraq - we should drop hammocks.

I want to become the national spokesperson for the hammock industry. That’s my new goal.

I’m on Crack

My name’s Todd and I’m addicted to my new Blackberry Curve. The latest, greatest offering from the Crackberry family (and my first such device after years with the Sidekick and Treo) could very well be the greatest PDA in the history of PDAs.

The email, Web, phone, text, camera, blah, blah, blah, features are easy, seamless and fast. It’s compact and doesn’t feel like you’re carting around one of those old brick-like phones that Zack from “Saved by the Bell” used. (Oh, stop - you know EXACTLY what I’m talking about.)

Now, I was already an email whore, but now it’s even worse if that’s possible. I just want to whip it out and show it to everyone. (Yes, the Blackberry. Yes, that too.) I’m not usually the early-adopter, latest-greatest-technology guy. But, that may now change. I haven’t finished reading the manual, but I think it can babysit the kid too.

Making Every Round of Golf Fun

Golf is frustrating. Golf will almost always piss you off. But, what if there were another aspect to the game that didn’t involve losing a ball in the water, woods, or even middle of the damn fairway? That’s where the Stewart Golf X3R Remote Golf Caddie comes in. Dubbed “the fairway Ferrari” - it’s like playing golf with R2D2 (and who wouldn’t want to do that?). It’s only two grand.